grandma is not doing fine lately.
Since jan 31, she has been in and out of the hospital 3x already.
1st time: NUH, main artery blocked. did ballooning. major heart attack, was lucky to survive.
2nd time: blood sugar too low. was slurring. was admitted as afraid it was 2nd heart attack. short stay, discharged on new year's eve
3rd time: pneumonia. still in hospital now.

went to see her yesterday. just nice it's lunch time. fed her some porridge and watermelon. she is so weak.
ever since her major heart attack, her heart has been very weak. I juz wonder how long she is going to survive all these ordeals and when she is not going to survive. it's not that i'm heartless and wishes that she dies, i juz feel that, it's less painful for her and less painful for her relatives to see her like that. really pains my heart to see her suffering at this age and yet there is nothing we can do to relieve her pain.

so it's not a bad idea to go. moreover, my grandma, being a staunch Christian, i believe that when she dies, she will definitely by up there with God. Oh yah, btw, when she was in critical condition in ICU the first time in hospital, she saw her angel.

anyway, i believe things happen for a reason. last time my mum's side of family don't really understand when my mil was in and out of hospital and the mental stress that a family face when a family member is critically ill. so now perhaps it's god's way of letting them learnt a lesson. Watching a family member so critically ill, you will tend to see light many things, especially money. i always believe, when we are born, we come with nothing. when we die, we will bring nothing. These eight words (in Chinese) has been carved in my mind since late last year. Of course, i was angry and unhappy when my husband's business was 'cheated' of 10k of his profit, but i know there is retribution and i can see it happening already. i rest my case.
anyway, i wish her all the best.