Highly tensed

Past week was highly stress and it was taking a toll on me this week. Was glad to have completed a big bulk of marking last week, otherwise it would be worse.

Yesterday when I got home, I did bring out a math revision paper for Marcus to do, just that I didn't write it down as for Mabel, I wrote it down because her was from certain pages of the assessment books.

So when I went home, saw Marcus reading, asked him if he had finish the maths. He said I didn't assign him. That's when I erupted. How could it be I didn't assign him any work when his maths prelims is on the following day? Yes, I admitted I forgot to bring out the paper.

Then Marcus just continued reading. So at that point of time, I gave up. Since he not worried, y should I worry for him and get so worked up?

I didn't have dinner with them at the table. I just carried a bowl of soup tote room and closed the door. Drank my soup and started working in my own stuff.

Managed to complete two work stuff. By then it was 8 plus. Just stayed in the room an watch tv. Didn't settle them to sleep at 10. Basically, just myself and iPhone. That's all. I dun feel like caring, or temporarily sun want to care about the children.

Even this morning, didn't have the motivation to wake up on time. Usually, when I fetch them to school, when they alight, I would say bye Mabel, bye Marcus. Today I juz said a general bye.

I dunno if I'm disappointed with my ch or disappointed with myself. Sometimes, at a point in life, u feel disappointed, rejected in life. U feel that u were not in the top form like we used to be. Is it a cycle of life? It's like a ferris wheel. Whatever at the top must come down, similarly whatever at the bottom, will go up. It just takes time.