rainbow bridge and faye

it is raining now and the sun is still shining brightly. Someone said, there will be rainbow.

It reminds me of rainbow bridge that Ser said and of course, i thought of Faye. I don't know if this is a sign. But whatever the outcome, we want the best for her, for her not to suffer.

Yes, it is painful to let go of something so dear to you. But think of it this way, the pain you are suffering now is small as compared to the suffering she had to go through. So, it's difficult to let go and it's painful, but for her, you have to do it. When she is at rainbow bridge, she will be alright and fine again.

Max

Max had some music performance today in school. Adrian went to watch. Later, I will be seeing the pictures that he took of Max.

Max is musically inclined.

Mabel

yesterday, mabel called home at 330pm and said she was on her way back. Almost 5pm, she was not back yet. When she came back, I started to question her.

I asked her if she had detoured to the playground while on her way back. Her first reaction, she shook her head. I asked the same question again, she shook her head again. I asked her the third time, then she said yes.

I was angry with her for making people worried and worst of all, she did not admit her mistake. She tried to cover up her mistake.
I gave her a very lecture.

Today, she called me at 430pm using her friend's house telephone and asked me if she could go to her friend's house. I asked her back, where she was. She told me at a friend's house. I told her that she already decided to go and went to her friend's house already, why on earth does she have to ask me if she can go to her friend's house? never mind, i let her. she told me she will be back before 6pm.

Just before 6pm, her friend called me, told me they still have some homework to do, she will go back before 630pm. Later, her friend called again and asked if mabel could have dinner there, i disapproved. Minutes later, her friend called again and told me her mum had cooked extra, i insisted on bringing Mabel back.

just one word, angry and disappointed with her. Yes, the homework was all done but the way she handled the situation was not satisfactory. As i was typing the blog, i was thinking, why didn't i told her no she can't go to her friend's house and insist that she return home straight away? i was too soft. and i think Mabel knows this, that's why she called me and didn't call Adrian.

silly me

This morning during silent reading, i was reading reader's digest on this article.

30 something year old Australia man, has a wife, has a toddler. But he's an adventurous man. He loves kayaking, mountain climbing etc. He had this dream, the most selfish and riskiest one (according to him) to kayak alone from Australia, Tasmania to New Zealand. But he did not reach his destination, his kayak was found, but his body was not.

I cried. cried because when he left, his son was crying for him, shouting for him as he kayak away from the shore. cried again when i saw the pic of the crying son being carried by the mother, waiting in New Zealand as the search team was conducting the search. It was so painful.

As a woman, i wondered, why didn't the wife stop him? In fact, knowing his love for adventure, she did not stop him from fulfilling his dream despite knowing that she may lose him. Indeed, this thing happened in 2007, i wondered how she survived these 4 years. It must have been devastating. I wonder if i can be as understanding as the woman.

Recently, adrian made me dig out the old vcd and lend it to Kelvin. The storyline of that movie and the song has been circling in my head these few days. That's why my blog yesterday. People only regret when they lose something precious, then having to live through the memories and wishing the person was alive or time can be turned back.

can't change the past, only you can decide on your future.

Realization

Suddenly just realize, life is unpredictable, ate there things that you have not done and if today were your last day, would you regret not doing it?

So treat every day as if your last, live life to fullest. Dont regret u have not done what u want to do.

Was listening to 再说一次我爱你, then the realisation came to me.


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Gardening

My dead periwinkle plant.

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Home improvement 1

Adrian is into this home improvement project, DIY project recently.









The original color was dark brown.




Very organized cupboard.






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Realisation

As I was walking around max's school and waiting for him, I realized, I uses to study at this place during my jc!!!!

It was a community centre last time, I would meet my best friend to study here for our year 1 exams.

What the...! The realization just got to me. That was like almost 20 years ago!!!! Omg!

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What a morning

This morning, I had to bring max to see a doc, then bring him to school as he has photo taking and then bring him home again.

So we went to coffeeshop to have breakfast, ate vegetarian bee hoon, siew Mai and har kao. Max liked the har kao and I bought another 'long' for him.

Then went to the usual family doc but he was closed. 1015am. So had to go yo another clinic. Waited so long for our turn though there are only 3 people in front of us. 2 patients took a long time.

The sky turned darker and darker. By the time we finished wif the doc, it's 11am and max starts school at 1130am.

An it was pouring heavily!!!! We had no umbrella. So in the end, I kept my phone in max's pocket and then I carried him and quickly made our way home.we were both totally drenched.

Once reached home, alamak! Windows not close, whole sofa drenched. Went up to room, whole floor wet, luckily window near study table was closed.

Then quickly bathe max and helped him change. I didn't have time to bathe, I just changed a dry art of clothes and off we went. Left at 1122am. Ok, still can make it, not very late.

And I had to be careful not to speed as it was raining. Better late than never.

Reached school at 1138am. Just nice. Now waiting for max's class to take photo and can go home.

My hair is still wet and I hope I dont catch a cold.

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This is so funny

You know you are on the laptop and in your virtual world too much when your colleagues think that you are talking about gardening but virtual gardening.

One of my periwinkle plant actually withered despite watering my plants every morning. So I googled this morning to find out more. This is what i found:

Vinca or Periwinkle will grow in range of light conditions, from full sun to shade. They will do well in average soils. They are both heat and drought tolerant. This makes Vinca ideal in hot, dry parts of the country where other flowers will wither and wilt.

The plant is heat and drought tolerant, no wonder, i'm killing my plant by overwatering.

Hence, upon realization, i made a loud exclamation, and naturally my colleagues were curious, so i told them what happened. The first question they asked me is whether i'm talking about gardening virtually. I was like laughing out loud. If it's virtual gardening, i would not even bother to google, just let the plant die.

I said, this is real gardening, that's why need to google. Everyone thought i was talking about virtual gardening!!! That's so funny.

Quotable quotes

We can't change our past. What we can do is accept it, learn from it, and not repeat for the same mistakes.


We can't change our past, what we can change is the future.




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Parents

Why do parents keep the truth from their children? Is it out of goodwill or concerned that their children cannot take it?

The truth hurts. Can the children handle the truth? can they handle the ugly truth?

Can the truth be hidden forever?

Cars

Damn it, activate my abs again.

Nissan car drivers cannot drive!!!!. Slow and too careful. Filtering out halfway, then decide, forgot to stop and give way, just stop suddenly. What the hell!!!

Then yet another Nissan car, so slow, when I overtake, buay song, then tailgate me.




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Pain

There are different kinds of pain, some pain, short, just have to shout it out and the pain is over.

Some pain, it lingers in your heart. It does not go away, you thought it was gone, but sometimes, it comes back again. Then it hurts.

Some pain, u cannot say, u have to keep it in your heart. The reason for keeping in your heart is it's best this way so that the other party is happy. When the other party is happy, u will be happy for the person, so u got to bear this pain alone.



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Completed

Don't ask me why it is yellow, according to Adrian, he chose barley white.

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Pulau Ubin

As usual, the time of the year to go Pulau Ubin.













As it rained on Friday, it was cooling. and the air was fresh!

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scolding 3M

Yesterday was like day of scolding children.

Started with marcus, he said he was tired and didn't want to have chinese tuition and even called me halfway through his tuition and cried, i just put down the phone. So after dinner, (he was sleeping when i reached home), I had a talk with him. I showed him the article of the recruit trying to swim away from Tekong (btw, what was the recruit thinking about?) I asked him a lot of why questions. Why do you think he did that? Why do you think he is stressed?

I related the article to his present situation, he is like the recruit, he has to face his academic drills every day, he feels stressed, so he is thinking of how to escape all these. I told him, his behaviour is giving me a signal that he is escaping. Anyway, I told him to think of his own solution, if his solution is not deemed mature, i will overwrite it and come out with my solution for him. I told him, in the eyes of law, children aged 14 and below are deemed as immature to make a sensible decision.

Hence, i gave him 2 options: A) assessment + homework daily, stressed, deal with it happily and get his entertainment. b) assessment+homework daily, no entertainment even after completing. Sleep since he says he's tired.

So he chose A.

I also kind of like taught him to deal with stress, mind over body. He will need follow up and monitoring. Gosh, why do i feel like i am diagnosing Marcus?

Next, max. While i was lecturing marcus, he took the marker and drew on the study table. When marcus wanted to tell me, he pulled marcus t-shirt and started crying. Since he was naked and going to bathe, i get him and mabel to finish up their bath first.

As usual, he was crying buckets as i was scolding him, (wonder if he listened to what i was saying) i was angry with him because
1) he knew i would scold, yet he continued to do it, it didn't stop him from doing it
2) there are proper materials for him to draw if he wants to
3) he made his sister wrote things on the drawer
4) he tried to cover up when i found out.

as for mabel, i chided her for not using her judgement. She knew it was wrong and yet she did it after being persuaded to do it. As an elder sister, she didn't stop max from doing it and even helped him. I told mabel, her actions is signalling me a dangerous sign which i explained to her.

as for max, last night, he got his first caning from me. 1 stroke on the hand. and the funny thing is, he was crying and bargaining on his punishment. i asked him to choose, hand or buttock. he said no, i realise, children at his age only makes decision that benefit themselves.

So i literally had to use force to make him open up his right palm, he wanted to close the palm, i said no. I told him, he drew on my walls and sofa before, i did not really scold him, this incident is too much, my limit, is unacceptable. so i get him to steady his hand, then he blurted out, 'cannot beat so painful' I almost burst out laughing, but i controlled. so whacked.

needless to say, he cried even louder. i feel so much wanting to step up to hug him, but cannot. After beating, i walked away from the room. Let the other adult go and sayang and reinforce the discipline.

Progress 3

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Multiple blasts rock Mumbai in "terror strike" - Channel NewsAsia

Multiple blasts rock Mumbai in "terror strike" - Channel NewsAsia

Heart feels heavy. I hope life can get back to normal in Mumbai asap.

Bathroom progress 2

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